


Practice Makes Perfect, Right?

by loOkMA_iTyPeLiKeDiS



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Complete stupidity, F/M, Goofy - Freeform, Keith (Voltron) is So Done, Lance (Voltron) is a Good Boyfriend, Lance is one suave motherfucker, Pidge | Katie Holt is a Mess, Soft Plance, a mess from start to finish lol, frank discussions of blowjobs, light floof, vulgarity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-30
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2020-03-29 17:31:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19024609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loOkMA_iTyPeLiKeDiS/pseuds/loOkMA_iTyPeLiKeDiS
Summary: Pidge knows nothing about blowjobs. So who better to ask for advice than Keith?





	Practice Makes Perfect, Right?

**Author's Note:**

> i found this in some old planning notes and had to finish it lmao
> 
> this was originally written as a part of [Performance Issues](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15681276), but it’s effective as a standalone prequel thing

“Pidge… let me finish revising my psych essay,” Lance chuckled, though he didn’t particularly try to move her away from him as she sucked on his neck. “It’s due in an hour.”

“You know what else we can do in an hour?” she muttered against his skin, trailing slow kisses down to his collarbone and tugging down the front of his shirt to press a kiss on his sternum. “Besides, didn’t you say you were craving Italian earlier? Special delivery, Lance.”

Pidge smirked as she glanced up, and to her pleasure, he wasn’t even looking at his laptop’s screen anymore.

She definitely had him.

And she was right, because he didn’t protest as she took his laptop off his lap and moved it onto his bedside nightstand. And he certainly didn’t fight anything when she crawled onto his lap and straddled his crotch. Lance sighed miserably, leaning back against his headboard and staring helplessly as she grabbed the hem of her tank top and slowly peeled it off her body. She’d decided against wearing a bra that day, and it definitely paid off. She couldn’t help but feel smug as she tossed it over her shoulder, and Lance looked like he was about to die.

(Or bust a nut in like two seconds which was quite flattering).

“You are a horrible, evil little woman.” He shook his head in disdain, though his eyes weren’t on her face. “I’m gonna fail my class because of you.”

She hummed in amusement and leaned in, moulding her lips to his in a slow, filthy kiss that had him groaning from low in his throat. His hands slid up along her sides, one tangling into her hair and the other gripping her waist as she ground down deliberately slow on him. She could feel his erection growing underneath her, and Pidge rolled her hips harder, putting more pressure and relishing in his ragged exhales. The friction felt really amazing too and she let slip a little moan into his mouth.

“Pidge…” Lance murmured when she slid her hands under his t-shirt and raked her nails lightly over his abdomen. “I hate to stop, but at best, I can give you fifteen minutes, max. I really need to work on the essay.”

“Okay, then let me take care of you for fifteen minutes.”

She’d never given him a blowjob before—or anyone really—and whenever they fooled around, he usually took charge so she wanted to give it a try for once. After all, how hard could it be? Her dorm roommates back in freshman year had all talked about it like it was eating a lollipop, which couldn’t be too hard. Sure, Lance was kind of hung, and she had a relatively small mouth, but she was pretty sure she could manage it. Plus, people always talked about how fun it was and Pidge wanted to turn Lance into a whimpering mess for once.

“Take care of me, huh?” He gave her an absolutely obscene look as he gently caressed her thighs. “What’d you have in mind, babe?”

And _that_ was a look she’d seen on Lance’s face pretty much every time her hands ended up in his boxers—though she _had_ seen muted variations of it directed at her prior to them dating—something that always made her flush because she may have been somewhat inexperienced, but she was _not_ naïve and she knew exactly what that dark look in his eyes meant. He was all in for getting a blowjob from her.

Probably had been looking forward to it for a while.

“You’ll see…”

Pidge crawled backwards so she was crouched above his thighs and popped open the button of his jeans. Lance went pretty quiet, seemingly holding his breath, but she could still feel the intensity of his gaze on her. But as she tugged down his jeans a bit and started toying with the waistband of his boxers, she started hesitating.

Lance was pitching a pretty impressive tent.

She’d seen his dick before, but it wasn’t like she spent time staring at it before they had sex and while she’d touched it before, it was mostly when she was just getting him up and running. Even when they messed around in the shower, he was usually behind her so she’d never gotten a good look at (Not So) Little Lancey Lance.

Pidge licked her lips a bit anxiously, realising suddenly that she didn’t actually know _how_ to start. She’d never done this before because Lance was her first experienced boyfriend _and_ her first boyfriend who wasn’t a virgin and he had to have had a lot of blowjobs before and probably good ones and what if she completely butchered it and turned him off to her forever?

Pidge was very confident in bed and she knew how to get Lance riled up and she knew how to be sexy or suave or perfectly flirtatious and she generally succeeded, but _this_? This was out of her area of expertise. She needed some practice or research or _something_ first because the last thing she wanted to do was make a fool of herself.

Lance sensed her hesitation and gave her a concerned look. “Pidgey? You okay?”

She was saved from answering when her phone suddenly blared its ringtone for a call. Without missing a beat, she hopped off the bed and ran to her bag to get it, picking up immediately and pretending to be enraptured in the conversation. It was just one of those automated calls from the pharmacy reminding her to pick up her prescription, but she nodded, frowning pensively like there was someone else talking on the line.

“Oh my God, that really sucks!” Pidge said with a small gasp as she picked up her shirt to put back on. “Yeah, no, don’t worry; I’m on my way. Five minutes. Yeah— yeah, no problem. Don’t worry about it!”

She pretended to end the already ended call and pulled her shirt on with slightly shaking fingers while Lance stared at her, his eyes narrowed a bit incredulously.

“Everything okay…?”

“My lab partner was trying to fix the circuitry with our robot and kind of made it blow up, so, ummm, so I need to go fix it.” She lied, giving him a weak smile and running a hand through her hair with a nervous chuckle. “But uhhh… raincheck, Lance?”

He looked like she’d given him whiplash, confusion written all over his face as he watched her stumble around to put on her sneakers. “Yeah, I guess… still on for a movie night tomorrow?”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll be at my place.” She leaned over to give Lance a quick kiss before snatching up her schoolbag and running off.

It was a horrible way to end the night and a stupid excuse she knew he wasn’t buying, but she needed to regroup and figure this blowjob shtick out first because there was no way she was about to look like Booboo the Fool trying to give him head.

So the next afternoon, she went back to his and Keith’s apartment when she knew Lance probably wouldn’t be in. It’d taken her a lot of thought about what she should do about her dilemma, but she could only come up with one logical conclusion.

Keith was sitting on a stool at the kitchen counter eating some cereal and reviewing notes when she came in but he gave her a chin nod in greeting.

She wrung her hands together. “Hey Keith, is Lance home?”

Keith slurped up another spoonful and shook his head. “Just left like two minutes ago to go spot Hunk at the gym. You want me to call him back?”

“Uh, no… I’m glad he’s not here.” She sat on the stool near Keith, reaching forward to take one of the pieces of bacon on his plate. She broke off a crunchy bit and popped it in her mouth. “I need help, Keith.”

“Yeah? With what?” he muttered, still distracted as he skimmed his paper.

“Can you teach me how to suck a cock?”

Keith immediately choked on his breakfast, spitting up some milk, coughing violently and dropping his spoon in a clatter as he pounded on his chest. His face burned with his flush, and Pidge rested her chin on her palm, munching on the savoury bacon and waiting patiently until he got himself under control. But even when he’d gotten his breathing under control, he was still completely and totally red.

He wiped his chin with the sleeve of his sweatshirt and glowered at her. “ _Why_ are you asking me this?!”

“I was trying to give Lance a blowjob yesterday, but I didn’t know how. I would have asked Shiro for help, but last month when I asked him to pick up my birth control, I think he had a stroke. Apparently he hadn’t known I was having sex with Lance in the first place, so I can’t ask him about _this_. And Allura’s studying abroad remember, so she’s asleep right now. So you’re the only one I can ask because you’re the only one with an ample repertoire of experience.”

His nose wrinkled uncomfortably. “Pidge…”

“And keep in mind,” she continued, “I will never ask my mother about sex because _eww._ And Matt’s the best brother anyone could ask for and super chill, but hell to the fucking no I would never ask him a question like this either.”

“Why don’t you just ask Lance how he likes his blowjobs then?” Keith shook his head like it was just wrong. “God, this is the _last_ thing I wanted to talk about during breakfast.”

“I want to surprise him and blow him away with professional, porn level skills. Pun completely intended.” Pidge felt her cheeks flush a bit. “He’s always eating me out and helping me relax and never forces me to reciprocate so I want to return the favour. He shouldn’t have to do any work during a blowjob so it’s on me to make sure I know what I’m doing.”

Keith looked utterly perturbed. “I think _I’m_ having a stroke.”

“Keith… I would rather get some good advice from a master of the art than some rando on the internet. Please tell me how to give a good blowjob?” She batted her eyelashes at him, something she knew made it impossible for any of her friends, and especially Lance, to turn her down.

“Look.” He huffed, looking weary and defeated. “It’s not… it’s not rocket science, okay?”

“Rocket science comes easy to me.”

Keith gave her an annoyed look and she grinned. “Dicks are pretty sensitive. So any warm holes are going to get a good reaction so you’re already at an advantage. You just have to, you know… suck on him. Don’t just move up and down.”

She took her phone out and opened up a notepad app to start taking notes. “Can you demonstrate that for me?”

Keith’s face burned red and he picked up a banana from the fruit bowl. “So when you’re bobbing, don’t just move your head. Stroke with your tongue and you know, _suck_. Get a firm grip with your hands on the shaft and twist them, but not like a stress ball because you don’t want to rip off foreskin or something.”

He demonstrated, wrapping his mouth around the butt of the banana and hollowing his cheeks as he sucked and moving his head up and down. She watched his technique, paying close attention to the way his hands rotated in time with the bobbing. When Pidge had finished making notes on her phone, Keith took his mouth off the banana, though he was averting his gaze like he couldn’t believe what he was showing her.

“So it is like sucking a lollipop. Complete with the slurpy noise…”

“I guess. And it’s okay if you’re slurping. A dry blowjob can tear the skin, so make sure to use lots of spit or lube.” Keith wiped off the banana and set it back in the bowl but he still didn’t meet her gaze. “And whatever you do, for the love of quiznak, _don’t_ use teeth by default. You have to ask if it’s okay first.”

Pidge glanced up from her notes. “Do you like teeth, Keith?”

Keith let out an involuntary shudder. “I don’t think teeth are particularly pleasant but there are some guys I’ve sucked off who enjoy the feeling.”

“Got it,” she muttered, scribbling on her phone with her stylus. “Bite into his dick if he’s into that.”

“ _Jesus fucking Christ_ , Pidge!” Keith exclaimed in horror. “ _Gentle_ scraping or light nibbles only! It’s not corn on the cob. Don’t just chomp down on a dick! No guy wants a chunk of his dick bit off! Write that down right now. NO biting!”

She amended the comment. “Okay… sorry. So how do I avoid using teeth?”

“Wrap your lips over your teeth, so use lots of chapstick too, because your lips will get dry. I use one of those solidified coconut oil chapsticks. It’s a natural lubricant too.”

“That’s a good tip.”

“Also, don’t be afraid to get messy. I was taught that if it’s not messy enough to need a shower by the end, it wasn’t moistened enough.” Keith rubbed at an aged coffee stain on the counter. “I personally like fruit flavoured lube, some people really use their spit all over. Really, you can use any liquids and fluids if you’re adventurous. But holy shit, don’t use liquor. Or gasoline…”

Pidge gave him a weird look. What the hell kind of experience had he gone through for gasoline to even come up in the first place?

“Use your hands and fondle other parts down there too,” he continued, watching as she scribbled some more notes.

Pidge had to fight off her smile. “Which other parts?”

Keith’s face was the colour of his sweatshirt by this point. “Y-you know… the balls… and the taint.”

“What the hell is a taint?”

“It’s the strip of skin leading to the…” he tapered off and gestured carelessly with his hand.

Pidge knew what he was trying to say, but she kind of wanted to fuck with him some more. “The what?”

He rolled his index finger into his thumb to form a tight hole. “ _That_.”

“ _That_?!” Keith’s traumatised look was just too much and he’d been embarrassed this whole conversation and she just about died laughing while he spluttered indignantly. “Keith, just say corn hole or pooper or something!”

“I’m trying to take this conversation seriously! Stop laughing!” Keith barked. “Anyway, don’t expect your first blowjob to be perfect. You’ll probably gag every other second. And if you attempt deep throating don’t eat any spicy food beforehand because if it comes back up…”

Pidge stared at him with a raised brow and he quickly continued.

“N-not that that’s ever happened to me. It’s just an example, but anyway, no matter how awkward or shitty it is, remember that Lance loves you.” He set a hand on her shoulder in support. “And I don’t think he’ll think any less of you if you screw up.”

She smiled at her phone, her cheeks rouging a bit. “I know. I just don’t want it to be a nightmare experience.”

“Pidge, you could snap his dick in two and Lance would still be crazy about you. I’ve been his roommate for three years, and he’s never been this enraptured with any previous girlfriends. You’ll be fine no matter what you do. Don’t overthink it. Use your instincts, but above that, have fun with it and I promise you’ll come out of the experience wondering why you were making such a big fuss in the first place.”

“Thanks Keith,” she said gratefully, standing up from the stool to go on with her day. “I’ll see you later, kay.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He stopped her by the sleeve before she could move too far though. “And whenever you choose to do this, can you please do it at _your_ apartment? You guys are too loud, and I’m sick of hearing _‘Harder! Slower! Deeper! Faster!’_ interspersed throughout some stupid Limp Bizkit song when I’m trying to sleep.”

“Oh. Sorry…”

Her cheeks burned red and she hurried to leave the apartment, wondering what other private stuff Keith might have heard in the past.

But Pidge didn’t immediately go home.

Keith’s tips and brief demonstration had been good enough for a starting point, but now she needed to go the extra mile and actually get some practice in. She couldn’t suck anyone else’s dick, so she figured the next best thing was to purchase a dildo that resembled a dick.

Slightly embarrassed, she’d put on her sunglasses to hide her face and gone to a high tier sex shop downtown. The clerk had been so sweet and helped her browse the aisles of realistic dildos they had in stock, thankfully saying nothing of her hiding her face indoors and even better, not asking any questions as to why she wanted one in the first place.

Truth be told, it was quite an overwhelming experience for a first timer.

They looked unbelievably real, complete with the veins and the pinker head and the wrinkly beanbagginess of balls—and some with scary super lifelike foreskin!—and Pidge was ready to run after seeing just three. Some of the most expensive ones even felt like skin, and although a bit scared, she was very impressed.

After a handful of minutes, she’d quickly ended up picking one of the cheapest ones, some innovative dildo that you could fill up with any kind of liquid by squeezing the balls hard and then make it squirt out said liquid by squeezing the balls hard again. She thought it was kind of fun, so she got the one closest to Lance’s size and skin tone, bought some peanut butter flavoured lube they were advertising and headed home.

By the time she’d returned to her apartment, it was pretty late, but she was excited to test out her new toy, affectionately dubbed L.A.N.C.E., that is: (For) Learning (And) Applying New Cock (Sucking) Exercises. It wasn’t the best name she’d ever come up with, but it was better than D.I.C.K: Developing Innovative Cock (Sucking Techniques Wor)Kout (Tool).

She’d cleaned it up per the instructions and set it on her living room table, then followed the manual to squeeze the lube in the hole in the tip and fill up the dildo. And then she got to work, squeezing out a bit of the lube to help slicken it up and using what she’d seen Keith do. It was a little awkward figuring out how to rearrange her mouth and how to fold in her lips and move her tongue along the side of the dildo shaft, but she liked to think she was doing okay. The hand motions weren’t so bad, but the up and down for her head, she couldn’t do right and like Keith had warned her, anytime the head of the dildo brushed the back of her throat, she gagged.

Pidge was in the middle of trying to figure out how to fondle the balls while sucking when an apartment door opened and shut, and for a few seconds, she didn’t register that it was _her_ door, until Lance rounded the corner.

“Hey, I bought… some…”

Pidge let out a muffled cry, yanking her head off L.A.N.C.E. and in her surprise, squeezing the dildo’s balls too hard. Lube squirted out of the tip like a stupid geyser, some hitting her on the mouth while she and Lance both stood there gaping.

“Holy shit...” Lance muttered slowly, his eyes wide and lips twitching like he was trying his damned hardest not to crack up.

Pidge jumped out of her seat and tried to sprint to her room to lock the door and hide under her covers for the rest of her life or something, but Lance caught her wrist before she could get past him and stopped her from running. She tried to pull out of his grasp, but he had a tight grip and clearly wasn’t going to let her run away. He backed up until he was sitting on the arm of the sofa and pulled her along so she was standing in front of him.

“Okay. We need to talk.”

Heat exploded on her face. “Lance, let me go!”

“Pidge, what’s going on? I won’t judge your activities or anything, but uh… I walked in to quite the sight.” He was snickering and Pidge groaned in embarrassment, refusing to look at him as he leaned over a bit to get another glimpse at the dildo. “Is that supposed to be _my_ dick?”

“Look, okay? I bought a lifelike dildo because I wanted to practice giving a blowjob because I don’t know how and I just wanted to please you!”

“You succeeded. It was extremely pleasing to see,” he responded playfully.

“Movie night’s off!” Pidge’s cheeks felt so hot and she tried again to escape his clutches. “Let me be so I can go crawl in a hole and die!”

“No need for dramatics.” Lance rolled his eyes goodnaturedly. He tugged her forward and wound his arms around her waist. “I had a feeling that’s why you were hesitating yesterday night. Why didn’t you just ask me? I would be more than happy to walk you through it, just like you tell me what feels best for you. It’s all about communication anyway.”

“I was embarrassed. You’re like great at sex— _stop that_!” She covered his mouth with her hand when he smirked. “I’m saying you have so much more experience and I didn’t want to make a fool of myself when you’re probably used to high quality girlfriends!”

“Katie.” He peeled her hand off his face and the smug look had softened to an affectionate annoyance. “I have been with no one of higher quality than the crazy, squirting-dildo sucking girlfriend I have right now.”

Her heart skipped a beat in her chest.

“Really?”

Lance gave her a warm smile. “Truly.”

Pidge smiled shyly, her pulse racing as her face flushed. “…I was freaking out for no reason, huh?”

“When you’re worried about something, just tell me, _hermosa_. I’ve got you.” He reached up to wipe off a small bit of lube on her temple and then brushed some loose hair off her forehead and behind her ear. “If you’re not ready for anything like that, we don’t have to do that, Pidge. I mean yeah, I would love it if you blew me. I’d be lying if I said I haven’t fantasized about it. But I would rather you be comfortable and ready for it when it happens. I’m willing to wait patiently, no matter how long that takes.”

It meant so much to her to hear him say that. He had no idea how much he’d quelled all of her anxiety about the blowjob situation. She wrapped her arms loosely around his shoulders and pressed her lips to his. She sighed happily when he kissed her back, relishing in the warmth from his mouth.

“I love you so much, Lance,” Pidge murmured, nuzzling his nose with hers.

“I love you too, Katie.” He rested his forehead against hers, a shit-eating grin growing on his face. “So what do you say? Do you want to skip movie night and instead you finish sucking off that dildo? I was really enjoying the live entertainment.”

“Fat chance, you moron,” she drawled.

“Fair enough.” He dropped a quick peck on her lips before standing up and holding up the grocery bag in his hand. “Oh by the way, I bought some corn on the cob. Wanna oven roast it and eat it while watching the movie?”

Pidge stared at the bag of shucked corn for a second and then started laughing.

“Hmm?” Lance blinked in confusion. “What’s funny?”

“Nothing.” She buried her face in his shirt and snorted to herself. “I went through so much stupidity today…”

But at least now she knew what to do for the future.

She’d make sure it was a perfectly unforgettable, special experience just for Lance.

**Author's Note:**

> And a week later, Lance’s dick ended up out of commission when Pidge accidentally scraped him hard with her teeth and made him bleed.


End file.
